Here is a summary of what I have learned after studying the subconscious mind in the past four months.
My two primary sources were Psycho-Cybernetics and Self Mastery Through Conscious Autosuggeston, which I have read multiple times.
The “Why”
Most people are self-limiting. We can do way more than we believe. Even worse, most of us underrate ourselves; we shortchange ourselves, and sell ourselves short. The result is that most people suffer from feelings of inferiority.
The goal is to “get more living out of life”. To become the best version we can be. It’s our duty to use the talents and potential that we have.
95% of our behavior, feeling, and response is habitual and automatic. These automatic mechanisms play themselves out in the subconscious mind. Put differently: We only use 5% of our mind’s potential.
These automatic habits are not set in stone. They can be changed.
The human brain is engineered as a goal-seeking mechanism.
Feed this mechanism with thoughs of failure and past mistakes, and it will act as a failure mechanism.
Feed this mechanism with optimism and a worthwhile goal, and it will act as a success mechanism.
The sad thing is that most people are constantly reliving their failures and bad memories. They block and sabotage themselves.
The automatic mechanism is unconscious. We cannot see the wheels turning.
How is this mechnism controlled? Through thoughts and feelings. Not willpower.
When using the subconscious mind, we are in effect harnessing the placebo effect. Patients receiving a placebo believe they are receiving legitimate medicine. The key word is “believe”. We can use the same effect to cure illnesses and bring success to our lives.
Our brain and nervous system cannot tell the difference between a real experience, and one that is vividly imagined.
Therefore, our imagination is the most important tool we can use.
We need to develop the habit of reliving past successes. Connect with “that winning feeling”. And use this to “prime” ourselves for success.
How can we succeed if we constantly remember our past failures and bad moments? It creates a negative spiral.
What we want is a positive spiral. When you remember your past successes, it leads to self-confidence and optimism. This energy can then be used as fuel to create more success in the present moment.
You need to “start with the end in mind”. Picture the end result, as vividly as possible. If you are a musician, picture a finished song, picture standing on stage, performing your work. If you are an autor, picture the finished book, people reading it, telling you how much they liked it. Add details and feelings. Be proud of your work. Imagine people being happy and touched by your work.
Relaxation is more important than willpower. Willpower leads to tension, which blocks your success mechanism. Just relax and let your automatic mechanism do the work.
Your work is to imagine, to feel, and to feed the goal to your subconscious mind. Then relax and let your subconscious mind guide you. That’s how “getting ideas in the shower” works. You relax. You let things flow. And whatever you need to do comes automatically. No willpower needed.
We need to maintain a positive aggressive goal-striving attitude. Attack challenges with massive action. Do this in reality as well as in imagination. Imagine yourself overcoming all challenges. Never fall back to a passive, defensive, victim-like attitude.
We need to do all things with a zest, with a gusto.
The failure-type personality does not direct his energy and emotional steam toward a worthwile goal. Instead, this person complains, drowns in self-pity or “swallows” his frustration, leading to illness and unhappiness.
Work remains one of the best therapies, and one of the best tranquilizers for a troubled spirit.
A human is like a bicycle. It maintains it’s poise and equilibrium only so long as it is going forward toward something.
Our disturbed feelings are caused not by externals, but by our own responses. We need to learn how to ignore, delay or change these responses.
Mistakes are good. Without them, learning is impossible. But, mistakes are only a means to an end. Once we succeed, we should forget the mistakes. We should only remember the successful attempt.
When your automatic mechanism is “set for success” we experience “that winning feeling”.
Develop a nostalgia for the future instead of for the past. Have something to look forward to. Don’t live in the past. That’s what old people do.
Gradualness is important. We need to arrange things so that we can succeed in little things, and then gradually build up. Like weight lifters and boxers do. Success is build upon success. If you start with something too difficult, you will never have the momentum to continue.
We are responsible for our own life. The past explains how we got here. But where we go from here is our responsibility. Blaming others and complaining does not improve our life. Accept where you came from, and do the best with what you have.
As the placebo effect shows, the body is capable of healing itself. In fact, all healing is self-healing. “The surgeon dresses the wound, God heals it.”
We need to cultivate an “inner smile”. The best way is to imagine a goal, and feel good about having it. If you don’t feel good about something, it won’t work. Feelings are always stronger than thoughts. Your feelings and thoughts need to be in sync. If you imagine a goal but feel anxiety or frustration, the anxiety and frustration will win.
Not even willpower can overcome feelings. You can expend as much willpower as you want, if you don’t feel good about something, you won’t achieve it.
The “How”
Reserve judgement for 21 days, because it requires a minimum of 21 days to effect any perceptible change in a mental image or habit.
The goal is to develop new habits, new automatic patters. Which means that daily practice is key. Even if it’s just 5 minutes.
After you wake up:
- Practice the Coué method
- Relax
- „Day by day, in every way, I am getting better and better.“ (Repeat 20 times in a low, hearable voice)
- Tell yourself that you’ll be having a great day today. You will feel good. You will be successful. The more emotion you use, the better.
- Remember to start your “inner smile”
During the day:
- Cultivate an “inner smile” 24/7
- Coué method: If you have physical or emotional pain, put your hand on the hurting spot or your head (emotional pain), then relax and repeat 20 times “It passes. It passes. It passes”
- Relax regularly
- Relax all muscles and tensions (body scan)
- Picture yourself as a balloon that is being deflated
- Relax while working
- Allow yourself to “smile” into your brain and body
- Allow positive energy to enter as you exhale the negative
- Theatre of the mind
- When you begin, scan your body for tension and relax your head, torso, waist, legs, and so on
- Recall a past success
- Then go into the future and picture how you want to be with the same feeling you felt in the past
- Picture yourself vividly as succeeding
- See yourself acting and reacting appropriately, successfully, ideally
- Add emotion to what you’re seeing in the mind’s eye
- Use gradualness. Start small, then build up.
- Begin with a “suppose” (“Suppose this would work”)
- Next a “possibility” (“In theory, it is possible”)
- Then add details and emotions until you see it and feel it clearly
- Improve your daily behavior:
- Be as cheerful as possible
- Feel and act a little more friendly toward other people
- Be a little less critical and a little more tolerant toward other people
- Act as if success is inevitable
- Do not let your opinions color facts in a pessimistic or negative way
- How to prevent emotional scars
- Relax negative tensions to prevent scars
- Develop a thicker skin
- Use therapeutic forgiveness to remove old scars
- Consciously relive painful events
- Forgive yourself, and forgive the other person
- Then let it go forever
- How to be calmer
- “Let the telephone ring” (ignore automatic responses)
- “I can’t think about that right now” (delay automatic responses)
- When you feel angry, fearful, anxious, insecure -> relax
- Build an imaginary quiet room in your mind and retire to it regularly (your personal decompression chamber)
- Deliberate practice
- Practice without pressure (“shadowboxing”)
- Practice whatever you want to improve in a realistic way (social situations, giving talks etc.)
- This will take the pressure away when the “real situation” comes along
- Practice things in imagination if you can’t practice physically
- How to cure worry
- “What is the worst that can possibly happen?” and realize that it probably won’t be so bad.
- Practice positive mental imagery, immediately and “on cue”, whenever you become aware of negative feelings.
- How to change habits
- The best way to break a habit is to form a clear mental image of the desired end result, and to practice without effort toward reaching that goal
- Challenge your beliefs
- Is there any rational reason for such a belief? Why do I have it?
- Don’t just pass these questions by casually. Wrestle with them. Think hard on them. Get emotional about them.
- Can you see that you have cheated yourself and sold yourself short, not because of a “fact”, but only because some stupid belief?
- Arouse indignation, or even anger. Get mad. These can act as liberators.
- Whenever you are angry on someone, write a letter to the person. Pull out all the stops. Leave nothing to the imagination. Then burn the letter.
- How to disinhibit yourself
- Don’t wonder in advance what you are going to say
- Just open your mouth and say it
- Improvise
- Don’t plan
- Don’t think before you act
- Act, and correct your actions as you go along
- Stop criticizing yourself
- Make a habit of speaking louder than usual
- Compliment at least three people every day
- Tell people you like them, if you see something you like
- How to be calm
- Create in your imagination a vivid mental picture of yourself sitting quietly, composed, unmoved, “letting the telephone ring”
- Say to yourself, “I am letting the telephone ring”, whenever you are tempted to “obey” or respond to some fear-bell or anxiety-bell
- See yourself sitting quietly and unmoved while an associate rants and raves
- See yourself in various situations that have in the past upset you, only now you remain “set”, settled, poised, by not responding.
- Be like the stones against which the waves continually break
- Be around water (flow of ideas): take a shower, walk alongside water
- “Sleep on it”: Sometimes the best thing is to take a nap or sleep on something
- Clear your mechanism before undertaking a new task (go to your quiet room between tasks)
- See negative feelings as challenges
- “I’m gonna show them” attitude
- Reframe negative situations into something positive: make an effort to find the positive in a situation
- Feelings cannot be controlled by willpower
- Immediately replace negative feelings with a positive one, until this becomes automatic
- Change your memories
- Change past failures, modify the memories, like you modify a tape recording by adding material or replacing a recording
- Play with your memories. You don’t have to be a slave to them. Do with them whatever you want. Change them. Ignore them. Delete them.
- Act and feel young
- Do regular vigorous physical exercise
- People get old when they stop moving, when they get stuck, when they stop going forward
- Live in day-tight compartments
- Don’t worry about what was yesterday or what will be tomorrow
- Only care about today
- “When I fall asleep I die. When I wake up I start a new life”
Before you go to bed:
- Relax
- Go through your day and change all negative situations into positive ones. Imagine you acted and reacted perfectly.
- Practice the Coué method
- „Day by day, in every way, I am getting better and better.“ (Repeat 20 times in a low, hearable voice)
- Tell yourself that you will fall asleep easily. And that you will wake up fully refreshed.
- If you have children, you can make suggestions to them while they sleep (without waking them up), and also practice with them while they are awake.
Further reading
I highly recommend studying the original material:
- Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz
- Self Mastery Through Conscious Autosuggeston by Émile Coué
- Theatre of the Mind by Matt Furey
My results
While I believe I have only scrached the surface, here are some of the results I got by working with my subconscious mind for the past four months:
- I feel better and younger
- I look forward to the future, “the best is yet to come”
- I feel calmer and more relaxed
- I feel “one” with the Universe, I am “in flow”
I have made it a habit to apply those methods in my daily life and am looking forward to what the long-term benefits will be.
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